An Officer and a Master Coach

No Sir, it was not a cosmic joke. It was 1999, before I knew what a fabulous driver desire is, I was working with a law enforcement organization in a major US city. I was brought in as the executive coach to “fix” a few employees who had the unfortunate reputation with management to be labeled ‘broken’. I knew that meant there was a significant difference between what the employer wanted in terms of performance and what an employee saw as their duties. My first task with each ‘broken’ person was to build some connection and trust between us as well as credibility for the confidential coaching process. From there I could begin to listen for the gaps in their understanding of what was expected, any blocks one experienced in fulfilling responsibilities or maybe where overusing a strength resulted in shooting oneself in the foot.

I knew enough from my Adlerian counseling background to let them know that I understood how capable and responsible they are and only each of us is able to make changes in our own lives, including how we choose to respond to the changes life doles out. I started by stating the obvious, each person is valued enough by leadership to warrant the investment in their coaching. After that we met together with the boss to design agreed upon goals and measures of success. My clients quickly realized the only way out was through and the only person for the job of restoring a ‘broken’ reputation is the one it hangs on. They were less surprised that they had their own answers than they were by the way I assumed each was capable of getting oneself out of the hole they had dug themselves into. I hold the bar high on personal responsibility.

While I was coming and going from the highly secure building, one of the high ranking ‘unbroken’ officers noticed me and got curious enough about coaching to ask me to please step into his office and explain. I must have done it well enough because he adeptly contracted for coaching to begin that afternoon.

At the start of any coaching contract, identifying a person’s values and goals, purpose and vision for life is important. I find it useful to write their words for them to see as they speak what is often left unsaid. As I stood there at the empty easel page, waiting to capture his careful responses to these inquires about his life; he paused to tell me the most amazing thing.

First, you have to get the scene. We were in his ‘high in the air’ large private office; he was seated behind his massive shiny desk, wearing his intimidating true blue officer’s uniform, armed with a set of handcuffs, a Billy club, an automatic handgun, (I am not kidding; he was armed and dangerous!) wired for intelligence and enough modes of immediate communication to set off a hundred emergency responses across the state, if not Nation. I, by contrast, was standing there in my sturdy pumps, a skirted monochromatic blue business suit armed with my matching blue magic marker. I had a marker; he had a gun and he said, “You know, Pamela, I am a little bit afraid of you.” Yes, that’s what he said. I wanted to look for the candid cameras or raise my eyes toward God and ask, “Is this a cosmic joke?” Instead of doubling over in raucous laughter, I held my corporate composure and coaching presence while gazing curiously into his eyes. I used the trusted inquiry every good coach knows when unsure of what’s next... ‘Say more.” And he did, “You have a way of looking at me that makes me feel as if you can see all the way into my soul.” I nodded knowingly and simply replied, “Thank you. Let’s get started.”

The good officer found his true direction and fulfillment in life in the next two meetings. It seems his soul must have spoken quickly and clearly to him. He declined a further promotion, took a downgraded, less stressful position and moved to the tropics to live at the beach with his wife. I think he would say he got his priorities straight.

It is now fourteen years later, I have taken the ‘promotions’ all the way to the top called Master Coach and am highly honored to hold intimate and trusted conversations for change with regular people who are truly inspiring with their courageous choices. I have witnessed people discover where and how they forgot their gifts and capabilities, priorities or responsibilities and found their restored life direction and guiding values. I watched them reposition their hopes and dreams to the dashboard of their lives. Desire is a fabulous driver.

I have a worthy question for you; what are you driving for in life that has been detoured thus far?

Pamela Ramadei
MCC Executive Leadership Coach & Trainer
“Change is in the Moment of Choice”©